There on lessons to learn along the way to loving your body. When you transition to “I’ll never love my body until I get to x weight” or “I will be when my body is fit” to I am tired of feeling sick and uncomfortable so I want to just love me for me, the journey can have unexpected turns. I may be a dietitian and eating disorder expert but I am also a woman with lots of curves and self-doubts. I have also worked with thousands of women by now and had gathered the privilege to experience their transformation along sid them.
Here are ten lessons that will inspire you to take your own journey to love your body.
When recalling a time where the goal weight was hit or we looked our best, we usually don’t see joy. Instead, we are faced with the thought, “How did I not see how beautiful I was, I would kill to look like that now”. It happens over and over. The important lesson is not to strive to return to that weight or time, but to see that right now, this current version of yourself is one you will look back upon and reflect the same way. Enjoying, feeling beautiful, and relish this time so that when you do look back you can now say I lived life to the fullest and loved with all my heart, including myself.
It is possible to look at a picture and judge one minute but loves it another. Most people hear their voices, see a picture of themselves, or watch themselves on video and quickly judge while others see how amazing they are. If you decide I don’t like myself in pictures, then you won’t look to see how this can change. It takes practice to leave the judgment aside and use our kind eyes. Ask ourselves what we love about ourselves in a picture or celebrate something amazing about a video. This is a choice. Choose your kind eyes and don’t stop looking until how you view it changes. Trust me it will.
When we spend all our energy trying to look a certain way for an event, it can ruin us from enjoying the event. If we miss the goal, we don’t want to go shopping and feel like a failure. If we hit the goal, we are worried about maintaining it and spend the event avoiding food to fit into our dress. This keeps us out of the present and away from the celebration we are attending. I have found my clients who forgo the event goal, focus on daily choices to feel good, and show up as they tell me it was the most fun they have had at an event in their life.
When we show up to learn about others, we learn just how amazing we are. One of my clients didn’t want to attend a party because someone she envied as more beautiful was going to be there. We set the goal to befriend her, learn more about her, and do the opposite of avoiding. The next day she told me how much she loved her and they laughed and cackled all night. She learned to look beyond the outside and allowed others to see her beyond the outside as well. Confidence was born that night and the same can happen to you.
Looking in the mirror and facing our bodies can change how we view it. One client told me she would never like her thighs. She always wore pants to bed. She agreed to wear shorts to bed and lotion her legs every night. Suddenly one day she looked at her legs and thought, looking good. We can’t avoid mirrors or self-care until we like what we see. We will like what we see when we change how we view.
When we start to feel love for our bodies, we feel free. We have more clothing options, we get dressed quicker, we don’t settle for uncomfortable clothes to be a smaller size, we move because we want to take care of our body, and enjoy the moments without worrying if our stomach is sucked in.
No one remembers the dress, shoes, or waist size but everyone remembers your smile, how you laugh, and how kind you are. Loving your body is letting go of a number on the scale. Being preoccupied with weight makes us self-focused because we are worried about how we look or how we are being judged. It keeps us small and held back from people. This is the opposite of what we crave, connection.
Not hiding our bodies is amazing for our sex life. When we stop judging ourselves we can enjoy sex more which makes us want more of it. This leaves us happier and more connected to our significant other. The ripple effect of this is endless.
We end up giving more of a place that is filled up with energy. When we are smiling more and feeling free in our bodies, we want to show up more and make others feel good. Not that you don’t do this when your self-esteem is lower but it feels different when you don’t need validation from it. Your needs are met because you are taking care of them and so giving comes from a different place and won’t drain us.
We realize how much energy was spent thinking about food, weight, clothing sizes, and goals. Once the fog lifts and your energy is freed up for other things, it is impossible to go back. Your life is no longer on hold until you shrink, you are living your free life and there is no turning back.
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