I didn't want to be selfish - The Free Life


“We can do no great things, only small things with great love.”
Mother Teresa

I love this quote because it is a reminder how small acts can make a big difference.

I will never forget the moment a waiter at the Cracker Barrel told me my check was paid for by a random stranger. I had heard of this happening but never experienced it. It filled my heart with so much love and hope.

You mean this is how it makes someone feel? I was hooked.

Ever since that day I never leave a Cracker Barrel without paying for someone’s meal. The waitress told me she loves when people do this because it starts a chain reaction of ripple effects all day in the restaurant and she gets to witness it.Â

The ripple effect of one act is real and powerful. Once you see what you can create you will be hooked also, but what happens when the giving is not in our control? When we give and people take but it doesn’t feed our soul or give us energy? We might judge ourselves for feeling this way but it is not your fault. There is a reason you feel this way.
Small acts done ONLY for the love of others that DON’T feel good to you, can cause anger, resentment, or loneliness to creep in and fester.

This was me a few years ago. I wanted to be the good wife and mother. I didn’t want to be selfish. I needed to put my family first. This was just temporary I told myself. When my kids get older, my husband and I can travel and go after that bucket list. I felt so guilty that I wanted more instead of being grateful for what I had.

It took a family health scare to realize that time was not promised. It forced me to wake up and decide it was ok to get my needs met to. So I started a business. I quit my job. We moved to Costa Rica for a year. And I never looked back.

I was so afraid of being selfish but what I found was I have better relationships. I am a better, more present mom. Things got better not worse. Going after what I wanted led me to give MORE, help MORE people, and love MORE.

I have seen it over and over. Women who are not true to themselves but stuff it down because they love people so fiercely.

They never want to feel selfish so they give. and give. and give. Until one day they snap, go into depression, or binge.

Small acts with great love means you are taking care of others in a way that aligns with your values and feels amazing to you.

This kind of love encompasses everyone’s needs. It feels good from the giver and the receiver.

There is no residual backlash.

There are many ways to give. Make sure it is feeding you not draining you.

You choose how you give.

You choose who you give to.

You choose when you give and how.

And always make sure to give to yourself first. Let your heart be filled up so full knowing you are worthy of receiving. Then from that place turn it outward to give to those you love. From this place you will feel FREE

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